This is how I look at the hobby. It is your rail road and any tender that you like you can use. There is always a way to modify something if you take the time. Now the question becomes if you want to change the tender. It would no longer be accurate depending what you choose, but that may not matter to you. I have mixed and matched several things that never were on the same line, of in the same time period. It is you rail road and it is for your enjoyment first.
It really depends on what you're doing...different brands couple in different ways. My AHM/Rivarossi has a simple flat drawbar that slips over a pin, others have screwed drawbars or ones that plug into sockets. If you're asking about compatibility, that would remain to be seen by what your final product has.